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Figgkidd
' Figgkidd' is a terrible Australian rapper from Bankstown. He is often compared to Marky Mark, or Vanilla Ice. He won "most likely to suck a black guy off for a hood pass" in his high school yearbook. After winning some contest for wiggers that nobody cares about, he went on to spend his million dollars on one beat because he thought he was the shit. He can now be sighted at Blacktown "Actin down wit tha gangstas yo!" and snitching on everybody he goes by. He is 45, Sad, Lonely and searching for a korean ladyboy. Discography "Nothing worth mentioning" Early Life *It is generally known that Figgkid's mother always wanted a babygirl, but recieved him instead, as a result she used to dress him up and enter him in beauty pageants from age 2-17, He never won any. *As a Child he also lived in poverty due to his mothers crack habits (Figkidd himself being born as a crackbaby) as a result of this Figgkidd used to suck his brother off just to get something warm in his stomach. *Growing up, Figgkid wanted to be a pony, or a unicorn. *Figgkid has revealed he got his rap name in highschool, His peers used to call him Figgkid after it was found out that he only had 1 testicle *Was conceived in a 50 man gangbang, Notable attendees include Rosie O'Donnell & George Michael. *When he first met with Sony BMG most people thought he was actually a DJ, due to the fact that he was always making Dj gestures with his hands. It was found out soon enough that his hands actually shake due to early childhood truama, involving his father and fathers friends taking turns at using his ass as a cumdumpster. *Childhood was the closest he has ever been to a hood. *Before Rapping he had a short stint working at a gloryhole, then as a jizzmopper at a gaybar in Kings Cross, It is here that he fell in love with Black Culture. Personal Life & Interests *The embarrassment of carrying such a hilarious head around on his shoulders turned him to seclusion in 2007. *His Favorite songs are "GayBar" by "Electric Six" & "Don't Cha (Tranny Mix)" by "Jeferee Starr". Aswel as other classics such as "It's Raining Men" by "The Weather Girls" & "I Love The Nightlife" by "Alicia Bridges". *It is the mainstream view that having your name as a feature on any of FiggKidds songs is like being on the list for a gay bar. *Has kissed a boy and he liked it. *Figgkidd doesn't care about black people.. *Aspires to make a song with K-Fed Controversy During his time on Channel V's "Australias Gayest Rap Battler", He was seen trying on different colors of lipstick & lipgloss in the backstage segments of every episode. It was later revealed after the shows finale, that he was performing fellatio on the judges in exchange for wins against his opponents. His championship was never reverted due to the fact that nobody cared about, or watched the show at all. Channel V canceled the show and tried to act as if the whole airing was merely a parody of the state of current HipHop music. Rumours circulate to this day about the D-Grade celebrities reasons for going into hiding. It is most likely that his mainstream absence is related to his mothers undying wish to have a daughter. Pictures of the star dressed in drag arose in 2007. Most media sources speculate these pictures are either a media stunt to gain fame once again, or more likely, that the star has had a sex change to fullfill his mothers dying wish, As he is a mummy's boy. And just "want's mummy to be happy. I love you mummy.. Hugs and kisses.". Category:Living people